06 May 2006

Reasons I am not around my blog this week.......

Being busy for last few days. Worked long hours for the last 2 working days, plus I am lacking of sleep lately. With it, I went to bed early to chase back time lost. (I know you can't really replaced the time lost, but at least I am trying to do myself good not to carry on too many sleeply nights)

On Thursday, Hubby ran out middle of night when received MIL phone called, told me his mom really sick and coughing really bad. He called an ambulance to sent her to hospital and he meet his mom there without delay anymore time.

MIL dignosed with Pneumonia, next day she was discharged and sent home with Antibiotic. Hubby came home in the morning looks exhausted. I let him sleep in and send boyboy to playschool and after 2 1/2 hours, pick him up and we went to Mall to kill sometime, so daddy can sleep in.

Called my MIL on her condition, still coughing,, and she trying to explained why she have no choice to called Hubby that day, on and on... I stop her trying to carry on her explaination, and to say my part, besides she is coughing when talking.. I told her, he is her son, he must do when parent need their children most, it's alright to call him whenever she need us, I have no issues with this. I am glad she thought of Hubby first (where she have 6 kids, all of them have family too), but I know she knows my husband her youngest son is someone who she can count on. I am proud of him, whereby, When my family need me, my husband is always there and fully supportive.

My relationship with MIL took sometime to grow, some sort of misundersting, , mostly it's me who do not understand the row I am playing. However, with her and my husband unconditional, unselfish love and patient for me, they move me and have make learn to love her as part of my family. Besides, I am an easygoing person, also I have my family(sisters and brothers) who think positive and leading me to right path have shorten my journey to learn it from hard way, thanks to them.
On top of this, after being a mother, I've learned why MIL behaved that way before---> just because she is a mother to my husband.
Indeed, I know she is not my real mother, there is no equal love between my own mom and MIL, yet I have no excuses or reasons not to love this lady who is always put her children/ in-law children first and she shown us with actions.
Our relationship doesn't take long to grow.

Now, I am setting an example to my belove son, to love and respect unconditionally.

9 comments:

AsleyLee said...

将心比心,我们也希望自己的丈夫会对自己的家人好,但是。。。

很多时候我真的不懂该如何和自己的婆家的人相处!

他们太sarcastic...

Twinsmom said...

we all learn from mistake :). I once put my hubby in a very difficult situation until he never talk to his mom for almost half a year, terrible huh? but thanks goodness all those are the passed, like you, I learn how to think like her.

sometime when I have to stay in one room with the people I don't like, I just close one eye, and close all my ear LOL...

Lazymama said...

You are very direct and honest! Very seldom woman will admit that problem with MIL are due to ownself.

烦妈妈 said...

Nice to see you're back...and sorry about your MIL...

婆媳关系... is the most toughest lesson to learn in a marriage...

1+2mom said...

I so close to my MIL when i stop working, we know each other well from that day i start stay at home. We just argue once because of my son but all are over. I very respect those old folk, so if i dun like i just walk away.

Greenapple said...

hmmm .... my mum used to have a terrible relationship with my grandma (her MIL). it wasn't due to my mum, but my grandma. my mum was the one who got bullied. that, left me some fears. these days things are better as my grandma ages. when I met tomato I thought I would strive to avoid all that. at this stage, i, however, realize that regardless how positive I am, the complex feeling would remain, and it isn't gonna be easy.

after some incidences, i think I will set a wall, still. i used to think that the 'wall' isn't necessary. but i think that is the best way to protect myself.

wish me luck.
thanks for sharing this piece.
i believe many women have something to share regarding this matter.

Allyfeel said...

My Mil always tell me her mother told her she is not welcome home after married as she has a new home now.

A home of her own. No matter what happened it's your home and it's your family and you take effort to make things right. I think her mother is very wise.

When I first married, I insisted both me and hubby called my in laws "ma" and "pa" and my parents "mom" and "dad" NOT your father and Your mother.

You are a lucky women with such a loving hubby.

Zara's Mama said...

Me and Hui Sia share the same sentiment..

My mum passed away before I got married.. I also wanted to treat my MIL like my own mum.. but sometimes really don't know how to 相处.

Your own mother can never be replaced with anybody I believe.

Blogie-Talkie said...

Thank you to all who dropping by and jotting your thought. I feel your saying, I done that, I being there.

I would like to write more about this topic in Chinese someday,, Check out and see why my perception changed to be better (I think).

GreeenApple,
I wish you all best, by all mean, if you want someone to talk, Email me, I would love to know you more.